It’s likely that everyone reading this blog (including the two people writing it) have, at some point in their career, wondered why they made the career decision they made. At the time it seemed like such a good idea!

The obvious example would be leaving your position in a company to start your own business. And we have a lot of experience working with people who do this. This Blog, however, is for those that feel a need to change jobs (or organizations), compete for a promotion, or seek a new career path in the same organization.

One of us (Tony) quit his hospital administration job in Rhode Island to take a hospital administration job in Philadelphia. Three weeks into the Philadelphia job, he realized he made the worst job decision in his career (and now looking back – it was). Fortunately it ended well, but it could have just as easily ended poorly (he left Philadelphia and returned to Rhode Island in a new position). What happened? “The urge to move away from was much stronger than the urge to move to.” Meaning, there is a stronger (and perhaps impulsive) drive to leave than assessment of where it is best to go! And when this happens, the questions you should ask when vetting a new opportunity are often over-ridden or simply overlooked.

We also see and work with individuals who want to be promoted. In fact, this is common. Yet how many people desiring promotion actually enjoy the job and excel at it when they get it? A lot less than initially wanted the position. Why? Oftentimes the reason for wanting the promotion is: money, prestige, authority. Oh sure, these come with the promotion, no doubt about it. But also what comes is: increased responsibility, more challenging politics, more criticism and more people to manage, perhaps a new culture to learn and adapt to, and a new role in which you may not be the superstar that you were in the previous one

There is nothing wrong with changing jobs, seeking promotions and demanding greater responsibility and leadership for you. We applaud these behaviors and attitudes. And, not wanting them is also not bad; it is not failure. Not wanting them simply means there are other things you want and enjoy more, and may sincerely excel at best. And that is OK. What’s not OK is being dishonest with yourself or not even asking yourself the questions regarding your career motivations and drivers. A poor job decision will not only have a negative impact on you, but also on your family, friends and employees, in addition to the organization.

In Thursday’s Quick Tips we will identify the questions you should ask yourself as you are considering a career/job change.

Copyright 2010 Kubica and LaForest

Have you ever wondered why some people tend to make absolutely irrational decisions? Yet a more difficult question to consider is, has anyone wondered that about you?

Dan Ariely wrote an interesting book titled Predictably Irrational. Ariely is an MIT behavioral economist who in his book “refutes the common assumption that we behave in a fundamentally rational way.” One example he used: why do our headaches persist after taking a one-cent aspirin but disappear when we take a 50-cent aspirin?

We chose to use the word “obstinately” instead, because we have seen far too many business owners and entrepreneurs continue on an irrational course for their business even after seeing clear evidence that their course is wrong. Like the President of a manufacturing company who cut back on his sales staff because of the recession, yet his sales were strong, his competitors weakened by the recession and market research showed there was an opportunity to grow. He believed that he needed to conserve cash during the recession. Ignoring the evidence, he actually lost sales and lost revenue. Talk about notably repositioning your company…just not in the right direction.\

There is a part of us (some more than others) where we are so convinced we are smarter, more insightful, and right that we eschew any rational evidence to the contrary. We are more attached to our position and rightness, than doing the best thing. And we do so to our peril, and unfortunately we often don’t recognize we’re doing it.

Why is it that some people do better than we do when we believe they are nowhere near as smart and savvy as we are? Well, you have it wrong. They are smart and savvy – hard as that might be to accept. Why? Because they take the time to learn to be open to new ideas, new facts, and new ways of looking at issues. Creativity, innovation, and progress are the result of an open mind. Plainly speaking, righteousness and hubris cork growth.

We are, unfortunately, our own worst enemy. And the tragedy – we really don’t want it to be that way. If this describes you, then stop being obstinate, stop thinking you have all the answers and you just know, and start looking at the evidence and take action on it. If you don’t believe this describes you – test it and ask a friend, trusted colleague or advisor and make this decision based on evidence.

Copyright 2010 Kubica and LaForest

On Monday we wrote about the Partnership Factor – making it better through making you better. Today we offer ideas on how to help you help make your business partnership better.
We start by asking you to take an objective look at yourself. Why, because we have seen far too many partnerships suffer from self-deceit (a perpetuated lack of awareness or justification and entitlement around one’s not so helpful or poorly received behaviors). And once we get into a self-righteous position, it is hard to get off it and the longer we are there, the more entrenched and distorted our perspective becomes.
So here are our ideas to avoid making a decision you may regret:
1. Gather the facts. What is the evidence for your perceptions? Never use generalized language such as: my partner doesn’t support me; my partner has no business sense. Always ask – what is the evidence? How do I know? Without the facts, without evidence, you have nothing but personal (and sometimes offensive) emotionally charged opinion that will make the situation only worse and perhaps unrepairable.
2. Assess your own situation – again, using evidence
a. How do you contribute to the current issue?
b. How supportive are you?
c. What are the consequences of dissolving the partnership or removing a partner – on you, your other partners (if there are any) and on your business? (as compared to the benefits of managing and trying to improve the partnership— be clear on the cost/benefit factor)
3. Ask a trusted advisor and be open to hearing their observation even (or especially) if it reveals that you have work to do also.
4. Talk it out with your partners. Let them know your concerns and why you feel the way you feel – again using only objective evidence and as it relates to performance and your key business objectives. This dialogue will entail “healthy conflict”. Be prepared, be open and don’t attack. Focus on the goal for the partners to share their perspectives on what’s not working, the implications and establish common ground to move forward from.
5. Seek help
a. If the partnership is important, if the business is important and there is no observable evidence that there is an issue (other than your perception) it could be beneficial for you to seek outside help in the form of a business advisor and or a coach
b. Even if there is evidence that there is a need for improvement, and outside advisor can provide objective support
Some partnerships may need to be dissolved; they don’t work. And that’s fine as long as you have sincerely assessed it and have clearly anticipated the implications. Like any relationship, partnerships have their ups and downs. Don’t make the mistake of making an emotional decision. You may end up regretting it – and your customers may also.
©2010 Kubica & LaForest

OK you say – don’t start with this self-help pablum. What’s with you two? I’m a real businessperson who needs real business advice. Well, if that’s true keep reading.

Have you ever stopped to think about the impact you have on your partners, the partnership and therefore the business? Right, you’re perfect; we get it. It’s the other partner or partners who are the problem. No! And if you sincerely feel this way – dissolve your partnership today. Why, because your partners do not need to put up with your nonsense and self-deception.

Yes, we know these are strong words. So why did we choose to start our blog this way today? Because we see partnerships started by well meaning, caring people who want to make a real difference through their business, but end up perpetually snipping at each other and worse. And each time we start working with them, we find the same thing: misunderstanding shrouded in a lack of self-awareness and blame on the other(s). Sometimes talking with the partners we get the feeling we are teleported back to 1959 listening to the lyrics of the newly released song – Charlie Brown (why is every body always picking on me).

So you have two choices: you can recognize, through awareness, that the partnership is important and it’s worth working on, or you can get stuck in the “ain’t it awful” syndrome. You know, ain’t it awful that my partners don’t carry their share, ain’t it awful I have to do all the work. What’s interesting is when we talk with partners whose partnership is in trouble, they all feel this way. And if you get stuck in it, it can become a spin of “martyr, victim, rescuer routine”.  Really no fun, unnecessary, and a loss of precious time and energy.

It start’s with you and it starts with self-awareness. To make your partnership work takes personal effort. But awareness is not enough. You also need to care enough to want to make the partnership better, you need to know what to do to make it better, you need to know how to do it, and then you need to take action, consistently.

On Thursday we’ll give you some tips on how to improve your partnership through self-awareness, self-correction and self-management.

Copyright 2010 Kubica and LaForest

On Monday, we introduced the topic and the importance of networking. Today we offer our 10 step process that if practiced consistently, will help you promote yourself, build your network and grow your business:

[Pre Event]

1.   Learn to introduce yourself by full name, with a firm handshake and looking the other in the eye (not staring, but with interest and respect), and smile. This is a confident and warm approach.  If you prefer, take out the handshake. The others are requirements unless you are in a culturally sensitive geography to direct eye contact or a handshake. And remember, the conversation is in a conversational tone between two peers, meaning you have something to offer.
2.   Create your short script (and practice it) which identifies who you are, who you represent, what you do and the value you provide. (This should be two sentences max-clear and concise.)
3.   Create at least three questions, or curiosities related to the event or issues around the event and, anticipating who might be there, use these as an opener to initiate conversation.
4.   Set a goal for new contacts/connections per event. We suggest at least 3 (and that doesn’t include just picking up a business card). Think about if there are particular “target” folks that you want to meet and would benefit from meeting. (We suggest that when going to a conference/event, you identify before hand the people you would like to meet.) Also, be open to the serendipity of meeting people. There is often a little magic that happens in meeting just the right folks at the right time; meaning don’t disengage if someone is reaching out to you first (unless of course you have a valid reason.)

[At the event]

5.   Extend yourself (reach out and introduce yourself to a person) and sincerely listen to what the other person is saying (making sure you “register” their name, who they represent/work for and what they do) – an exchange of cards is appropriate and make sure you note on the back of the card the event, location/date you met them and what you discussed. This is essential for a targeted follow-up note.
6.   Add value–Identify a thought, idea, strategy or resource that you can offer them that may be of interest or assistance—here you are providing value to them, and if you’ve done a good job, this will encourage their openness to future conversations.
7.   Be time conscious–Don’t hog their time (or hide with them) as you both have other folks to meet.
8.   Close with an appreciation statement about meeting them, and permission to follow-up. As you leave, look them in the eye, smile and again either shake their hand or not depending on your comfort level (and keeping in mind the cultural norms and sensitivities) and move along and around the room.

[Post event]

9. Within one business day—take 10 minutes to evaluate how you did; what worked, what you could do differently or better (“lessons learned”).

10. Schedule (yes, as a task on your calendar so it gets done) a value add follow-up with your new connections within one business week, so it is fresh and to anchor the relationship.  Then maintain contact and grow the relationship (aka: it’s a process not an event.)

Another powerful strategy is to use a buddy system, whereas you mention the person you came with and that you want them to meet each other as well (and they do the same for you)—and you can double your efforts. One caveat to remember – you did not come to the event to spend time with your colleague/partner, you went there to meet new people and promote new opportunities.

One additional thought, to get yourself into the mindset of meeting people (and some people, as we mentioned, have a difficult time with meeting new people), is to engage in constructive self-talk. An example would be to tell yourself how beneficial this will be as you meet new people and find new opportunities to grow your business, knowing (and truly believing) that the person you meet will themselves benefit from the value you have to offer.

And finally, we have written about influence and the importance of influence in getting things done. These micro-meetings are the first stage to creating influence. And each follow-up discussion / meeting builds on the concept of reciprocity and mutuality -providing something of meaningful value to the other person, who will in turn provide something of value to you.

Difficult – for some yes. Worth it – absolutely.

To your networking ease and success!

©2010 Kubica & LaForest

There is an inescapable fact that comes with owning and running a business and having a key role within an organization: you have to get out there, meet prospective customers and sell. In other words – you have to network. Yet for many, meeting new people and starting conversation with strangers is on their top 3 list of things they really don’t like to do – right behind public speaking and paying taxes!

Now of course, there are people who are natural social magnets. They love meeting new people, engaging in conversation and discussing ways their business can help. These are the extroverts or the borderline introverts who have learned how to be become skillful networkers. But for many of us (and one of the authors, Tony, falls into this category), networking is a challenge.

To get better at networking, or at anything for that matter, you have to believe that it’s important and worth your while. Think about it, how many of you actually spend time doing what you don’t like to do? So what do you do about having to do something you don’t like to do because to grow your business you must do it? You learn how to network, and you start in a safe environment.

Networking opportunities are literally everywhere. Whether you are at your son or daughter’s event, at a club, at parent’s night, at a local trade association meeting, there are networking opportunities. Now we did not pick these places casually. These are safe places. These are places where you can practice conversational engagement, asking provocative questions, in a conversational tone, with someone you already know. The difference from what you are doing now, is that you are probing, gently, into what the other person does, what they think about certain issues. You are practicing a networking conversion.

In Thursday’s Quick Tips, we will identify a 10-step process you can take to improve your networking skills and achieve positive results. In the meantime, remember, that to be successful in networking you must come across as a peer. That means you do not start the conversation by telling the other person how much you admire them, what a big fan you are. Fawning is out! This approach immediately makes you a subordinate.

Copyright 2010 Kubica and LaForest